Friendships and good conversation almost always begin with a similar connection. You discover a shared love for a type of food, a hobby or television show. You meet someone from the same city and talk about your favorite spots. You find someone who shares the same goal or humor. Making an initial connection can instantly lead to new conversation topics and create a more comfortable feeling to the relationship.
If fashion is something you’re passionate about, don’t be afraid to make connections through it! If you see someone with a similar style, talk to her about where she shops, what trends she likes right now and allow that initial dialogue to lead to other topics such as what she’s studying in school and or what extracurricular activities she’s involved in. The way you dress, can speak to others about your personality and interests.
Someone who loves bold patterns and bright colors is most likely outgoing and fun. Seeing a little of her personality through her style, and knowing you want to make friends with an outgoing girl could give you the confidence to start chatting with her. If you want to develop deep relationships with a more introverted girl then look for someone wearing soft colors, delicate floral or ruffles and lace. A girl with vintage flair or tribal patterns may have experience traveling or studying art and other cultures. Talking with her may offer some new insight on subjects you don’t often think of.
Compliments are good icebreakers when talking to someone for the first time. If you like a certain piece that a girl is wearing or want to know where she bought a dress, just ask! Don’t be too shy to tell someone what you’re thinking, because everyone appreciates a genuine compliment. Although the way a girl looks is not what solely makes her beautiful, feeling confident on the outside can help you feel confident on the inside. Compliments can build confidence in the recipient and the sender of the message.
Often, a girl doesn’t feel accepted for her outward appearance or doesn’t feel confident in her looks and that makes her disinclined to share what she’s like on the inside. Once you start a girl talking about style and trends that she’s in to, the conversation can be easily lead to other interests such as what she does on the weekend or books she likes to read. Making someone feel accepted about what she looks like, can make her feel encouraged about opening up and sharing her inner beauty and passions!
The way you dress, can speak to others about your personality and interests.
One of my best friendships started with a conversation about fashion! I met her at a party that a mutual friend threw to mark the first day of class. I introduced myself to my soon to be new friend, and told her that I liked what she was wearing. We talked a little about what we had on and she told me she was so relieved to see what I was wearing because it was of similar style and she had been unsure of what to wear. We both have eccentric taste with a mix of different styles. I could literally see the relief in her body language and we both warmed up to one another. The conversation then went on to her telling me about studying fashion as her major at university. Fashion turned out to be one of her biggest passions. She and I also discovered mutual friends, love for the same TV shows and more commonalities. Our conversation traveled from a simple statement about fashion to us discovering multiple similar interests. I learned we lived in the same dorm at college so we walked back together and she ended up staying in my room until about four a.m. just to continue our conversation. She even opened up to me on how she struggled her freshmen year before she transferred schools. I told her how freshmen year was hard for me too and it was obvious we were both glad to have a new friend with which to take on the new school year. After that I obviously knew the friendship was going to stick around!
Not every compliment or comment about another girl’s outfit is going to lead to a life long friendship, but it could so easily lead to a pleasant conversation positively impacting your day or someone else’s. In this world, we need relationships. God designed us to live in community with one another and we’re privileged to choose those with whom we want to have deep, significant relationships. Expressing oneself through fashion could lead to making connections over a similar style or a desired characteristic in a friend. We want to be known and to know God; relationships can help us in both of these categories. Sharing our passions can help make these connections, so don’t be afraid to use fashion as a tool to gain insight on a future friend.