How to Heal from the Pain of a Breakup
Romance is wonderful, you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. The light, airy feeling of being in love is rather enjoyable. But, a breakup hurts…. bad.
There’s actually a scientific reason for your physical heartache after a breakup. So, tell your girlfriends to be more supportive, your parents to stop bugging you about “getting over it” and your siblings to give up pushing you to move on.
You see, studies show that when you’re in the midst of romantic love, areas of your brain’s pleasure centers are overloaded with feel-good neurochemicals, including dopamine and oxytocin. But if you lose that love, those chemical levels plummet and stress hormones such as adrenaline, cortisol and epinephrine flood in. These chemicals bring about the feelings of anxiety and sadness and also launch your nervous system into fight-or-flight mode. As a result, extra blood flows to your muscles, which tense up, ready for action. This tension sometimes causes that tight squeezing sensation in your chest – resulting in a literal heartache.
Pretty amazing how God physically orchestrates the emotional progression we feel throughout life’s ups and downs. So, now that you’re experiencing heartache from a bad breakup – what do you do to fix it? Here’s nine ways to help you heal from a hurting heart.
1.) Reach a New Goal
Pursue something that you’ve been working toward. By successfully reaching a goal, you’ll release those “pleasure” hormones again through the feeling of accomplishment. So, work on that project you’ve been putting off because you’ve been spending so much time with your boyfriend. Or, engage in something new and invigorating. It doesn’t have to be big, little daily goals can help you feel better about yourself too.
2.) Exercise Regularly
Adrenaline is released when you workout, so by spending some time in physical activity, you’ll increase your confidence and boost how you feel. You don’t have to hit the gym for hours, a little every day goes a long way!
3.) Eat Chocolate and Ice Cream
There are actually quite a few foods that help boost your emotional wellbeing: asparagus, avocados, bananas, broccoli, brussels sprouts, beets, cauliflower, leafy greens, orange vegetables and fruits, peppers, strawberries, low-fat dairy, meat and poultry, lima beans, almonds, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds and chocolate. Yes, chocolate is in this list, so grab your favorite candy bar, make yourself some chocolate chip cookies or dig into some chocolate ice cream (after eating some of the healthy fruits and vegetables of coarse!)
4.) Hang out with Friends and Family
Being around people you love isn’t about bashing your boyfriend or using them to help lift you out of your pit or distract you from your loss. Surrounding yourself by loved ones will increase those “feel good” chemicals which will help you experience that tender emotion gained by being in love.
5.) Avoid Additional Stress
Now this doesn’t mean you can skip out of a test just because your boyfriend broke up with you, but it does mean you should try to avoid unnecessary or extra stress. Avoid making rash decisions, stay away from drugs and alcohol and don’t add new tasks to your life that will leave you feeling unfulfilled and worthless.
6.) Get a Good Laugh
Don’t watch sappy movies with your girlfriends, instead check out one of your favorite comedies. Laughter increases your “feel good” chemicals and will help lift you out of that slump.
7.) Escape from Your PJs
Take care of yourself. Wear your favorite outfit, take a few extra minutes to do your hair and make-up. Give yourself a mani and pedi. Take a long bubble bath and use those luxurious bath oils. By making yourself feel beautiful, you’ll begin to regain your confidence again. Confidence is essential to feeling good about yourself and knowing that you deserve more than what your previous boyfriend could offer.
8.) Say No to Rebound Relationships
You’re body will instinctively want to be in a relationship again to regain that good feeling. So, stay away from any possible new relationship because you’ll be entering into it for all the wrong reasons. If your old boyfriend wasn’t good for you, then remember why, otherwise you might find yourself wanting to go back to him. Once you’ve broken it off, keep your distance. It’s not your connection that’s drawing you back to him it’s your body’s chemical reaction.
9.) Stop Dating
If you’re in and out of relationships all the time, then maybe it’s time you take a dating break. You’re reeking havoc on your physical body, possibly making you an emotional mess. Since your body chemistry likes being in relationships, consider allowing your chemical reactions to level out, making you a happier, more stable person. You don’t need to rely on a boy or a relationship to make you happy. There is so much more to life than just feeling happy, and God is the only being in this world that can bring you the joy your truly desire.
Climb out of those break-up blues and seek the beautiful and vibrant life God desires for you to live. You are strong and beautiful. The only man that should define you is Jesus, so fall in love with Him, so He can lead you to a guy who’s worthy of receiving your heart.