There’s an incredibly powerful balance that occurs when male and female accept their birth gender. It’s a gift to be male, just as it’s a gift to be female. And for both, there are corresponding responsibilities. Unfortunately our society doesn’t see our being male or female as a gift, therefore we’re rather confused about our responsibility.
For example, females have this approach to life that they should be able to do anything a man can do, acting as if they were supposed to be a man, but weren’t given the body for it. As a result, women are taught to begrudge being female rather than embrace it as a beautiful gift. Or, there are women who use their bodies as if it were a gift for men rather than a gift from God. Rather than using their own body to benefit, serve, honor and glorify Him, they flaunt it for attention. Both of these approaches are rather unfair and confusing.
We need to receive our body and all the responsibilities that come with being male or female with joy and admiration. Our society needs to recover the value and distinction of being male and female. That can start with young Christians, who embrace the creator and celebrate the distinctness and responsibility of His created man and woman. If we’re able to embrace our gift with joyfulness, then we can truly reflect on the particular responsibilities we have in order to love others for the glory and honor of God.
Accepting our Male and Female Body
God created the male and female body and saw that it was good. God created Adam out of the dust of the earth, noticed that Adam needed a helper, so He created Eve out of Adam’s rib. There’s goodness in both male and female. We were created to embody our own identity, as well as honor and respect the identity of the other sex.
God made us flesh.We are not angels or some other spiritual being. We are physical beings – male and female. Jesus came to earth in the flesh, and He was identified as male. He didn’t come to earth asexual. He embraced his true male nature as well as honored the female nature. Because He came to earth as one gender, He then affirms the significant difference between the two.
Jesus also affirms male and female by coming to earth through the female body of Mary. Mary embraces God’s Son in her body through the Incarnation and Virgin Birth. The female body brought God into the world, which makes the distinction between male and female something worth celebrating.
We were created to be sexually differentiated creatures. When we begin to understand the significance of our distinctions, we can see that being male and female isn’t just theologically and morally significant, it is also philosophically and scientifically significant. Our culture, our politics, economy and psychology are all rooted in the makeup of being man or woman. So when we alter our identity or stray from its root, we shift everything that causes our society to function properly because we’re going against creation and science.
Our born gender is a serious matter. It takes a lot of effort to genetically engineer it or disguise it to be something it was not originally. This doesn’t mean we entirely deny the emotions, concerns and longings we may experience within, but rather, we learn more about them and embrace them according to our sexual identity.
Embrace our Sexual Identity
In order to embrace, rejoice, be grateful for and accept our physical identity, we must understand who God is and what our purpose is in life. Having a God-given purpose doesn’t hold us back, instead it creates intention, strength and power within.
To understand who we are in God, means we work toward viewing ourselves as God sees us. In order to understand God’s view of us, we must understand Him, who created us. We do this through various spiritual disciplines, which include reading and studying the Bible, spending time connecting with other believers, praying and practicing silence in order to hear from God. Spending time with God points us toward our humanity – our identity in Christ. Understanding God helps us understand our faults and failures compared to God’s truth and perfection. It points us toward contentment, flourishing and joy.
Friendships are Important
Jesus had several friends, none of which were romantic. We too should surround ourselves with a variety of friends that are not defined by romantic relations. Jesus didn’t live a defective life by not having sexual relationships. Our society has built this false idea that our identity is based on our sexual relationships and conquests. Our social media pages state our relationship status. We engage in hooking up with various people over the weekend to satisfy our personal sexual desires. We create words such as “bromance” to define a deep, male friendship. We’ve idealized a man and woman marrying their “best friend.”
Friendship has lost its significance and relevance in our society. In order for us to more naturally embrace our sexual identity, it’s important to value friendships. It doesn’t mean we need to have a plethora of friends, but we need to know the difference between romantic relationships and solid friendships.
The Bible uses four distinct terms to define love. Our society has not only confused these definitions by jumbling them all together in one word. We also falter what those definitions even mean. God’s love never fails, nor does it change. Therefore, when we grasp the various relationships in our life, we should evaluate them in light of how God defines love and honoring one another.
Not all relationships should be placed in the confies of romance or erotic love. Friendships are powerful and necessary. It can become rather unhealthy to confuse them with amorous connections. Romance isn’t just about labeling the number one person in your life or formalizing an agreement. When this is the case, friendship loses its dignity.
Diminish Sexualization of Everything
Living a life unconsumed by sex is a priveledge, but it is incredily difficult (nearly impossible) in our society. The church even produces its own form of sexualization through ministries focusing on families, which are birthed through the intimate connection between men and women. A nuclear family is essential in God’s economy, but it is not central.
God’s people are the center of His kingdom, but when we’re hindered by sexualization, we lose track of our identity, therefore our ability, gifts, talents, skills and purpose. In order for God to use us, we have to seek Him in the midst of all the sexualization. We have to choose to let God define us, not our sexual identity.
Sex is a beautiful and wonderful thing, and should be enjoyed by married couples. But many people live free from the stress and burdens of sexual satisfaction and live an incredibly happy, healthy and successful life. Focus simply on who God made you to be and how you are going to live according to His will for your life.
Finding Value as Male and Female
Our ideal should always be God, not some perversely sexualized perspective. With God as the ideal we’re striving for, it’s easy to assume we will all fail miserably. But, God is greater than failure and He will satisfy our longing because He is what we’re longing for.
In order to reach this place of contentment, it will require self-denial, self-control, patience, delayed gratification, etc. All things that our society loathes, but all things that make us stronger, more aware and more gracious. These emotions are often a sign of discipline, and discipline makes us cognizant of our true value. We are valued by God and by society because of our true identity and nature.