Healthy Dating Involves Knowing Where to Draw the Line When Spending Time With Your Boyfriend
“He’s gonna be moving soon.”
“I just really like spending time with him.”
“He doesn’t really have any other friends.”
Do these sound like some of the excuses you have for bailing on your friends to spend time with your man? Has your main squeeze started draining your friend time?
Real Life Positive Relationship Story
When I was in junior high I decided that I would never be that girl who talked more about her boyfriend than her best friend. I must say, I’ve failed at times. It’s hard. The guy I’ve been dating is wonderful and I often want to spend every waking minute with him. But, I have to keep reminding myself of how amazing my friends have been, through good times and bad. Even though I have a boyfriend it doesn’t mean I should neglect time-tested friendships. And, even though my boyfriend is moving in less than a month, I make it a priority to spend time with my girls. I care about my boyfriend a lot, but spending time with our other friends makes us both more interesting. We have more to talk about when we spend time with other friends and don’t have all the same activities.
By maintaining friendships while dating you learn to develop longer and deeper relationships that will pass the test of time. Who knows, maybe you’ll end up marrying your current boyfriend, but chances are you won’t. When you break-up will you have anyone there to comfort you? Or, will you have forsaken them so often that they got sick of leaving unanswered texts? Will you feel so alone that you stay in an unhealthy relationship just because you don’t have any other friends?
The key to figuring out if you’re spending too much time with your boyfriend is to ask people! Ask your friends if they feel left out of your life. Ask one of your gals to talk with you at lunch instead of sitting with your boyfriend. If he gets jealous then maybe you and your boy need to have a talk.
When it comes down to it, friendships are essential to being a healthy person. If your boyfriend is the only person you think about, or spend time with, it’s time to do some thinking about the priorities in your life. Spend time investing in things that will last, beyond the boy. Let your friends know that they matter to you and you want them to be in your life!
