Battling Jealousy
Have you ever experienced your best friend bringing a new friend around, and as a result you suddenly felt as though they were going to abandon you? Maybe you had a project due for a class and you preferred a fellow classmate’s work over your own, so you got angry? Or perhaps there’s a girl at school who you think is stunning, and suddenly you feel ugly? If any of these situations has happened to you, or something similar, then you’ve been struck by the green eyed monster—jealousy.
Jealousy is a powerful emotion that has the potential to hold you back from prospering. Jealousy occurs most often when you begin to compare yourself to those around you. If you feel dissatisfied with yourself in contrast to your peers, then you may feel left out, frustrated or bitter. Jealousy is a beast: it consumes everything in sight and if you don’t catch it in time it may be extremely hard for you to prevent it from swallowing you up in its evil grasps.
The best way to overcome your jealousy is to realize you’re feeling that way. Try writing out your current emotions and connect them to your situation. Do your best to understand your emotions and their association with jealousy. This process will help you figure out why you’re feeling those certain emotions. Don’t be afraid to question yourself with statements like “Why am I upset that John did well on his art project,” “Why am I afraid that Mary has a new friend,” or “Why am I upset that Gabriel looks great today?” Asking such questions will help you find the root of your jealousy and help you take the right steps to solving the issue at hand.
Once you’ve made the connections with why you feel jealous, it’s important to simply talk to the person you’re jealous of and explain how you feel. If you have concerns about your friendship with Mary, there’s no wrong in calmly expressing your fears to her. If you think John did excellent on his project, approach him and ask for tips so that you can do better on your next assignment. And, when you see Gabriel again, compliment her on how nice she looks! This will boost her spirits, and she’s likely to give you a compliment on a feature she finds beautiful about you. When you realize you feel jealous it’s important to take a step back and observe everything that’s happening around you. Doing this will help you see your shortcomings and strengths. You have the potential to learn more about yourself and grow into a strong individual who can love and support everyone.
It’s essential that you accept who God made you to be. He made you different from your peers because He knew you were perfect for certain skills and such beauty. If God had made you like everyone else, then there’d be no way to grow and become closer to Him. This is why He made you unique. Jealousy will uncover to you what is yours, what is not and what you need to do to achieve what you’re seeking. Instead of running toward Gabriel’s beauty, embrace the beauty you do have as well as celebrate the beauty of others. Rather than being fearful of loosing a friend, see the gift of friendship and utilize this relationship to help you grow. If you’re jealous of John’s talent, consider that may not be your expertise and focus on what is. Or see that the Lord has given you that same gift, and you need to work to make the talent stronger.
Plus, overcoming jealousy means seeing that others become jealous too. If you see someone who’s jealous of another person, with a loving and tender heart, offer them the compassion that they need. Working to help others in their jealousy, will help you discover healing and truth in your own heart. When you’re able to do this, you have overcome jealousy.
God has a plan for you, no matter how unnoticeable it may be in comparison to others. If you allow the monster to consume you and fill you with negative energy, then you no longer have that energy to use on the plan that God set for you. Pray about what God thinks of you and what His plan is for your life. Don’t be afraid to ask your friends and family either. You character stands out rather than your success. That’s why it’s important to remain patient and kind when dealing with jealousy.
